A Hard conversation: I hated you the first time I saw you, because you are white.

A part of me wishes I recorded the hard conversation I had with a homeless older (50′s-to early 60′s) African American man while I was still in Detroit.

Because it could help others realize your privilege is what other people can hate you for, even when you don’t realize you are privileged.

But I remember it often and it is a dear experience to me, and helps to keep me grounded.

I was in downtown Detroit in the Main Amphitheater inside Hart Plaza after meeting with the volunteer coordinators and fellow volunteers the day before Detroit Electronic Music Fest.

I hung back and wanted to talk with the volunteer organizers a bit since I volunteered a few years in a row and wanted to see how I could best help with my broad range of skills.

As I was waiting for a few conversations to end, the man walks by and gives me a hell of a stink eye. Brow furrowed and kept his eyes locked on me while walking past.

A couple minutes later he walks by the opposite way, and again, stink eye for days.

He came back about a minute later and said, “You know the first time I saw you I hated you.”

I’m curious by nature, didn’t shy away from difficult conversations, and was a psych major. I genuinely wanted to know how people thought. I said with a calm voice, “Why?”

“Because you are white.”

Not something you hear every day, but not the first time I heard something like this while living in Detroit.

He sat down and we talked for over an hour about race, humanity, and how we can help lift each other up. I brought up that race is a lie. The color of anyone’s skin doesn’t matter, white/black, we were all part of the same race, the human race.

The majority of people had left by that time and there were maybe only 3 or 4 people around. The few straggling volunteers were heading out and only the organizer, A fantastic talented African American woman Rachel, was making sure I was alright.

I shook his hand and hoped I helped change a little.

Rachel said, “That was a pretty intense conversation you seemed to be having with him.”

I said, There’s always an opportunity to witness.

And we walked out together.

That Detroit Electronic Music Fest was my second to last before leaving Detroit.

I miss the city, the sounds, and people, the artwork and the vibe of Greektown. It was so alive even through the hardest times.

The sense of community was always there.

I hope the hard conversations continue to happen though this trying time.

I’m seeing such a community come together that I’m proud to be part of this human race in 2020. I can’t wait to see how this changes the next generation. And hoping for a better tomorrow for everyone.

Holy NYCC Batman!

So it has been a little while since I’ve last posted about conventions.

I’ve been working on migrating over to the sparkling new Amazon Cloud, so the site will load a lot quicker no matter where in the Country/ World you are located.

I’ve been feverishly working on getting pages created / uploading content.

 

And well here’s a little something for your patience ;)

A good animated gif of Macaulay Culkin licking Seth Green’s face at the Robot Chicken Panel at NYCC 2011!

Link to mp4 version!

 

*Update*

The galleries were done a while ago, but had some hosting issues.

Here they are!

Panels Day 1! -DC Universe / Batman, Venture Brothers, and Robot Chicken.

Toys / Collectibles from the Convention!

Cosplay at NYCC!

First Impressions: Max Payne 3

Holy crap!

Honestly that is the first thing that comes to mind.

(I’ll have to re-write this when I get some time, but I really wanted to share with you all how amazing this is so far!)

I have been looking forward to Max Payne 3 for a while now. Even more so since last year I was fortunate enough to see the press preview at New York Comic Con (NYCC).

I ended up getting the Xbox360 version, since that was the version that I originally saw the demo done on. I normally go with PS3 version if the graphics will just look better or PC versions of games that I know will have a large support community or mods or that will have better graphics +2.

But the Xbox 360 version looks amazing for Max Payne 3, no worries there for graphics.

So the story is great, I love how they really show how broken Max really is. He is truly haunted by the events in the first game, even more so many years later.

He has taken to drinking heavily and popping pain killers. Which leads to the intersting camera work, and sometimes “blips*” in the camera when you are going through a cut scene. *note: the blips are not a glitch, they are intentional, and not really a blip persay. More like a “tear” I guess, it is hard to describe. *

So Max is broken, and gets talked into taking a body guard job in São Paulo Brazil for a wealthy family. Needless to say São Paulo is dangerous for the wealthy, and shit goes bad …fast.

The story has a normal amount of twists and turns in it so far through disc 1 (Xbox 360 has 2 discs, which I rather like since that gives a lot of content and doesn’t skimp on graphics or sound).

There are several difficulty levels: Easy, Medium, Hard, Hardcore, Oldschool.

Now there are a couple other options besides difficulty that you can choose from.

A lot of games now have the ability to turn on and off aim assist, which is nice to have if you are a casual gamer, just want to pick up a game and shoot some people,  or a hardcore gamer that doesn’t want any assistance at all.

But Max Payne 3 changes it up a little besides having just aim assist on and off. You also get the ability to have a hard lock, soft lock, or no target lock. The Hard lock sticks your targeting reticule on the enemy, the soft lock is like a sticky but doesn’t lock your sights on the enemy so you can skip over someone you want to save for later, and the no target lock speaks for itself.

I am a fan of the soft lock, because when you are in bullet-time you can really pump rounds into someone and then hit left trigger and switch to someone else and get more rounds etc until you are done with bullet-time. Super efficient and pretty darn bad-assed!

Speaking of Bullet-time, Dear God! You have the option now in all versions to slow down the last kill “kill-cam” or “bullet cam” so you can hold A in the Xbox 360 version and then just keep firing. Which again Good Lord! It is brutal!

Last night I got through disc 1 completely, and loved every minute of it. If you screw up a section you don’t have to go way back like other games make you, a lot of the sections are split up very nicely with the amount of enemies they throw at you. It doesn’t feel that bad to mess something up when you don’t have to spend more than 10 minutes killing a group of people.

The dialogue is well scripted, and the voice acting is, like always, incredible. My wife even laughed about a particular jab at a particular Jersey boy “you spray tan douchebag.”

I am not surprised that this game is getting so many rave reviews. “9.0 of 10″ “88 of 100″

I was just going to put the scores in, but the short reviews really do speak to the quality of this game.

Taken from computerandvideogames.com

OPM UK : 8/10 - A dark, cinematic single-player campaign lasting around ten hours coupled with a compelling multiplayer offering make this a worthy addition to the genre, even if it can’t quite compete in the very top tier. But for legacy’s sake, we hope that this time Max’s retirement is permanent.

  • GamesRadar10 - Between its pacing, its presentation, and its excellent gunplay, Max Payne 3 has raised the bar for other action games to follow. Welcome back.
  • G45/5 - Max Payne 3 is a technological tour de force that will have you screaming “Dear lord!” more times than midnight mass. The performances are top notch, the action plays out with unrivaled fluidity, and the multiplayer is deep and rewarding. Silly distractions aside, Max Payne 3 is an action lover’s wet dream that also happens to employ some of the slickest direction and transitional trickery this side of a David Fincher box set. Lock and load. It’s bullet time…time.
  • X360A93 - A true cinematic gaming masterpiece, Max Payne 3 is not just another triumph for Rockstar, but it’s also testament to what the developer can do when it turns its hand to linear storytelling. Max Payne 3 might be a stylistic shift for the series, but it’s also a raw and brutal portrait of a man pushed to the edge that deserves a place alongside Rockstar’s superlative open-world efforts. Get ready to enter a world of Payne.
  • IncGamers9/10 - An expert blend of cinematic storytelling and flamboyant action, weaved together by a team with a clear passion for the genre and the content. Payne never felt so good
  • StrategyInformer9.0 - As with Rockstar’s other franchises, Max Payne 3 is enveloped in love and a huge amount of dedication. This is a consistently thrilling and explosive tale that states its case as one of 2012′s best. I’d be hard pushed to find a game that has made me scream with excitement on such a regular basis, as the compelling narrative and rewarding gunplay conglomerate into a truly spectacular product. Max Payne 3 lets you star in your favourite action movies, minus the Wahlberg.
  • IGN9/10 - There are plenty of games which are celebrated for their gameplay but lack anything in way of story or character. Max Payne 3 is a different type of proposition. The gameplay is simple yet satisfying, but it’s entirely in the service of a strongly-authored narrative. Players aren’t at the liberty to roam, to explore, or to shake things up. Some might find this too controlling, but in return for your freedom, you’re rewarded with a mature genre piece which is also a finely-realised character study. Action games continue to inch the dial towards 11, sometimes at the expense of their narrative integrity. Max Payne 3, however, has the conviction to reign in the action, imbue it with purpose – the spectacle still sparkles but it also makes sense.
  • 1UPA- - Although the gunplay may still have its roots planted firmly in the past, the way Max Payne 3 showcases its world is undeniably forward thinking. It’s a bit strange to gain so much pleasure from Max’s suffering, but I guess that’s the true essence behind Rockstar’s magic.
  • GameReactor9/10 - Max Payne 3 is an accomplishment any way you look at it. The story may perhaps get a bit murky towards the end, but other than that it fires on all cylinders from beginning to end. The action will make your nose bleed, it’s well directed, and refreshingly free of the conventions that often plague this genre. This is, simply put, the best shooter I’ve played in a long time. Don’t let Payne’s beer belly fool you, he’s in the best shape of his career.
  • VideoGamer8/10 - In Max Payne 3 the risk of death and restart is often too great. Why do something that makes you look and feel like an action hero, when holding back behind cover means you’re more likely to survive? The shame, then, is that the difficulty encourages over-cautious play.
  • GamesTM8/10 - Ultimately, none of the story beats or polish mask the fact that Max Payne 3 is very much a refinement of an old formula, and if you’re looking for something brand new or revelatory it just isn’t here. However, what is amazing is how Rockstar has fallen back on its trademark production values and sublime attention to detail to update the franchise in a compelling way. Factor in some impressive multiplayer offerings and it’s still head-and-shoulders above most of its trigger-happy ilk. Which perhaps says as much about the state of the genre as it does Rockstar’s obvious skill.
  • The Guardian5/5 - Max Payne 3, then, is another stylish, self-conscious and enthrallingly full-bloodied title from the Rockstar hivemind. If it is at all possible to distil every great Hollywood action flick into one interactive experience – with all the wise-cracking thuggery and anti-hero angst that would entail – this is it.
  • GameInformer9.25 - No matter what gameplay mode I chose, I had a great time playing Max Payne 3. The gameplay doesn’t explore new territory, but delivers a retro charm that fans of the series should appreciate. It’s a new day for Max Payne, and at the same time, a return to his glorious past.
  • GameSpot9.0 - With savage gunplay and an absorbing personal story, Max Payne 3 is an exhilarating shooter that grabs hold of you and doesn’t let go.
  • Destructoid9.0 - Max Payne 3 is a fantastic package, with a top-notch presentation and plenty of content to keep players busy and happy. It may have been a long time in coming, but there’s no arguing with results, and Max is the kind of guy who gets them. Fans and newcomers alike are going to find plenty to enjoy in this exceptional title.
  • Joystiq4.5 - Max Payne 3, a game built out of remarkably implemented, masterfully presented parts. Video games live or die by the mechanisms that lie underneath. That’s why the graveyards are always full.
  • Polygon9/10 - This is the first time Rockstar has made a game that excels best as just that, supported and expertly augmented by the production values and attention to small details that its games have always been known for. It is uncompromisingly excellent, with a sense of focus that has secured Max Payne’s legacy once again.
  • The Telegraph4.5 - It may not have the scope of Rockstar’s most famous oeuvre, but it more than makes up for that in focus, detail and raw thrills.
  • OXM UK8/10 - Like its hero, Max Payne 3 has its flaws. The repetitive action might be reminiscent of the original games, but it’s still repetition, and ultimately that causes things to drag. Fortunately just like Max himself it’s also difficult to dislike – the plot isn’t something you’ll be able to leave alone for long, bullet time still has the capacity to thrill and the multiplayer provides the variety and unpredictability required for genuine longevity. This new spin on familiar action is proof, if proof were needed, that there’s life in the old dog yet.
  • GiantBomb4/5 - Rockstar Games modernizes and makes Max Payne its own, creating something grittier and more grounded in reality, if not quite as singular.
  • Eurogamer7/10 - What it has in abundance, though, is expensive-looking environments for Max to dive around in and then talk to himself, and that’s just about enough to keep you going for as long as it takes to settle the score. All the same, you can’t escape the feeling that Rockstar just isn’t as good at a pure third-person shooter as it is with the open worlds of Grand Theft Auto or Red Dead Redemption, and in this linear context it’s much harder to put up with its usual missteps in mechanics and difficulty.
  • Edge7 - This is a game about a world-weary killer doing the only thing he knows how to, and for all its spectacular action beats there’s something apt about Max’s fatigue.

Photo’s in Detroit

Currently getting ready to head out to take a lot of photo’s.

This will be my first Engagement photo set. And later on in the year or next, I will be taking their wedding photo’s as well as being the best man. (I can’t take the photo’s during the wedding, but the actual official wedding photo’s)

I’m looking forward to this, since I have no idea where we are going today. All I know is that these are going to be less “Utopian Engagement Photos.” They are not the “flowers, and parks” kind of people, but more of, they like the “broken future” and appreciate the beauty in things that are “run down.”

They want to make pictures that show “the world is not perfect, but it’s what you make of it that is really important” Since there are so many perfect Utopia engagement pictures.

So that in mind, I’m imagining sites that have no power, thus why I have LED battery powered lights :) and reflectors/diffusers.

This is going to be amazing!

Jazzed! NY Comicon!

I just heard back from NY Comicon about my press pass.
Well as you can infer from the title of te article that I was approved for a press pass!

Moving on up! So this will be around the 6th or 7th con that I’ve been press at, but the total amount of people at all of those cons probably is still less than one NY Comicon. Crazy right?

Well time to fly, literally!

Work + Texas = Exhaustion

I’m writing this little missive sitting in the airport in Austin Texas.
Currently I am waiting to board tthe plane. I had to get to the airport at around 9AM even though my plane Starts boarding at 11:28AM because the coworker I flew in with had some meetings early today. Joy!

Well tje fantastic thing about the Austin airport is they are not retarded like how the Washington Dulles airport is. No “trams” no “sorry sir you need to walk 3/4 of a mile because this checkpoint is closed even though everyone else directed you to this gate just to waste your time.”

Well I’m bored out of my mind, my head is swimming a little due to the small amount of sleep over these past 2 days in which I worked 35 hours. That’s right 35 hours in 2 days, 25 the first day and 10 the next.
At least we were able to hit up the best resturants and finished the night with fresh RoundRock donuts!

Oo announcements! Peace out!

Spam has actually gotten interesting

I made sure that I added an approval process for comments knowing that out in the “interwebs” there are things called “bots” that just post gibberish and links hoping that someone will click to generate revenue or lead to some kind of malicious software download by mistake.

Today I got two comments on my blog, one on a photo gallery which was a lot of german gibberish which wasn’t that interesting. It had a link that would entice someone to see girls on things called cams of the web (not posting the actual words lest I get more of this garbage before creating a filter.)

And a comment on Randomness (the tiny chopper post.) I was just going to file it under spam, but it was so interesting to me that I have to post it.
There were random links embedded in random spots in random words. All trying to sell timepieces.

“And he saw telling a twenty clasp and curiously. These gucci. Them aimed. She legged his gluco then and was after his watches. Replica the soccer. She have. Not you would deal away to the sudden fendi bags of the replica them could pre to the half didn’t back as a sound. fake watchesThe fendi as watches consorted nowhere. Paul sat of the battery watches. Authentic jacob had on the watches, checking to fall she up. Two movie, also the replica. The giorgio was from off a armani to the watches vest, and him wouldn’t the dress and calls then, thundered here to have the hand over name except his aesthetics. With the watches, in a reality and a tv, opened gone eyes from the chained anger. There comes the marc behind ekco and watches with himself. cartierBreil watches did. Using replica found, and the cheap watches broke as pullman direction. Jules again the jorgenson, of ladies watches. A floor of last beautiful games slithered to every matter, overlooking and coughing in the clotheshorse in the beaucourt watches. Sinn rushed he’d if the watches. Replica took, saving. However by the hugo. Neatly the gorilla monkey sounded to imagine with replica curled just chinese. panerai replica watchesRealise i to baseball replica. Actually, there seemed the hammer unless the stake in the everyone and him rolled of the little nothing in bordering watches melbourne. Eta consisted indeed weaving down. Enzo,’ she split, gripping still the nearby ferrari replica. Of the swiss, one of the gentle gold – of, strong – soft watches was old. Her he’d there hot at a rado but replica has. The oris knew to print of the replica in watches place, the engineer been in the night pants for litterbug – and – damme heaving. Take it, oscar. That cheap answered the online though the thirty over the watches blame doubt cursed paid to yaw about i the, and only right read bound closer like a pained revelations on no receipt. Geneve left the watches from drunken that on you.”

As you can see it was absolutely amazing spam! After a little bit of research I found that it came from Chisinau Moldova. International Ukrainian spam, now I feel important.

It reminds me of the Hungarian kid that wrote to Henry Rollins, I am really tempted to try and translate it now. :)

 

———

Update. I couldn’t help it, I really had to translate this. If I get some time maybe I’ll do little images to go along with this.

———-

“And he saw telling a twenty clasp and curiously.” –Ambiguous dude saw a large watch and was curious.

“ These gucci.” Dude! Gucci!

“Them aimed.” He pointed.

“She legged his gluco then and was after his watches.” She shanked him, and was stealing his stash of watches.

“Replica the soccer.” This one is soccer themed! France!

“She have.” Naw, I have that one already. Do you have Spain?

“Not you would deal away to the sudden fendi bags of the replica them could pre to the half didn’t back as a sound.” –Well if we sell the bags of replicas for half price we’d still have a lot of money.

“fake watchesThe fendi as watches consorted nowhere.” Get your knockoff watches! The “Boach” bags of fake watches you can’t get anywhere else!

“Paul sat of the battery watches.”  –“Paul! Get more watch batteries!”

“Authentic jacob had on the watches, checking to fall she up.” She took the watches to Jacob, an appraiser. He checked her out from legs to fake Fendi bags.

“Two movie, also the replica.” Jacob –“46 bucks and the fake Gucci for the lot.”

“The giorgio was from off a armani to the watches vest, and him wouldn’t the dress and calls then, thundered here to have the hand over name except his aesthetics.” -The Italian dressed to the gills in fine Armani demanded that they give him everything with “Armani” on it.

“With the watches, in a reality and a tv, opened gone eyes from the chained anger.” –Suddenly they were being hunted by Dog the bountyhunter on reality TV for selling knockoff watches. Forever shall their name be mud.

“There comes the marc behind ekco and watches with himself.” –Marc Ecko came to claim his stash with his “Unlimited Justice*” movement.

“cartierBreil watches did.” But Marc also took the Cartier watches, that bastard!

“Using replica found, and the cheap watches broke as pullman direction.” –He got his own for the replica watches he used all broke one after another like he was in a union.

“Jules again the jorgenson, of ladies watches.” –Jules is a pimp.

“A floor of last beautiful games slithered to every matter, overlooking and coughing in the clotheshorse in the beaucourt watches.” –Wow, Uh. The shuffleboard never looked better as Voldemort rocked it. He was in his zone as the elderly were sickly due to missing their meds because of the poor time pieces.

“Sinn rushed he’d if the watches.” If the watches told time correctly Sinn wouldn’t be late.

“Replica took, saving.” –You saved money, but not time.

“However by the hugo.” –However, Hugo was boss.

“Neatly the gorilla monkey sounded to imagine with replica curled just chinese.” Seriously? The big bouncer tried to read the directions, but they were in Cantonese and he only read Manchurian.

“panerai replica watchesRealise i to baseball replica.” Free Panera bread with every baseball watch purchase!”

“Actually, there seemed the hammer unless the stake in the everyone and him rolled of the little nothing in bordering watches melbourne.” –People were driving bargains, and they took the Aussies for a lot of money.

“Eta consisted indeed weaving down.” –Their estimated time was slowing down, as the batteries were cheap knockoffs as well.

“Enzo,’ she split, gripping still the nearby ferrari replica.” –The words still fresh on her lips as she hit the gas pedal. Wind tore through her mind and her hair as the rpm built to bursting under the whine of the engine…”Enzo”.

“Of the swiss, one of the gentle gold – of, strong – soft watches was old.” –Ah Swiss watches, like a fine wine is better with age. Superior quality, gold, perfect time pieces. These knockoffs are nothing like this.

“Her he’d there hot at a rado but replica has.” –Panting from the exertion, she was nearly spent, though yearning for more. But he would still rather have a replica watch.

“The oris knew to print of the replica in watches place, the engineer been in the night pants for litterbug – and – damme heaving.” –Oris was as good at engineering as making fliers. So much so he would like to pick up anarchist chicks that were throwing out trash incorrectly. What a rogue!

“Take it, oscar.” –“You take it!” Oscar.”

“That cheap answered the online though the thirty over the watches blame doubt cursed paid to yaw about i the, and only right read bound closer like a pained revelations on no receipt.” –Craiglist adds helped sell 30 watches so far, though people were bummed they were knockoffs and started to complain to the authorities, but they forgot to get a receipt. Out of luck.

“Geneve left the watches from drunken that on you.” –Geneve left some watches for a drunk.

How many people were involved in this? I’ve counted 12 people.

A torrid affair of selling watches at least on 2 continents, tons of watches, no arrests, and a lot of unhappy late people.